Well, It's 10.44PM, And in like 2hrs and 6 mins time, Terence & I will hit like 4 months. It's pretty surprising how time flies. And of course, I do not think that it is A BIG THING to reach 4 months. From my past relationships, I actually learnt that it's never about the quantity like how many years you are together with the person and stuff but rather it's about the quality of the relationship. I rather be with a person for 6 months and the relationship is smooth sailing than to be with a person for a year and I suffer like hell for the year. In every relationship, there's bound to be ups and downs(including mine). I do not hide it from anyone and tell everyone that I am doing SSOOO FINE when I am not, right Kim?! Who doesn't have little fights with their partners?! I admit I do lose my temper on Terence, I quarrel with him which I think I am freaking childish! But who cares?! We learn, We grow. Isn't that what life's about?!
For the past 2 weeks, I've heard of two misfortunes that really brought me back to memory lane.
First, was a close friend's break up. Well, it's common to suffer from break ups. But for this friend of mine, it's her first. It's pretty tough for her cos' I still remember how mine first break up felt. Her relationship is pretty much like Terence and mine back in Thailand: The Scheduled Courtship. When we both were so clear that we will return to our normal lives once we touch Singapore. Well, I remembered how painful it felt for us before we depart from Thailand. I remembered crying buckets and those tears can't stop flowing despite my smiles. And I knew at that point of time how much I loved that boy. Well, for this friend of mine, just like how you adviced me at a certain point of time, I am using those exact same words you did: I will pray for you that you will be okie, and that you will heal from this pain. I will give you my blessings, my strength to make you stronger as you walk down the route to recovery. IN ADDITION, A SIDE NOTE FOR YOU: Now that you still can talk him, now that you can still see him, just go ahead okie? Enjoy the moment. I know that we all have fears that it would be more difficult for separation if we still hang on. I tried, was there, done it, overcame it too. When he is REALLY GONE, then, you sob about it okie?! That's because, in my opinion, as long as you know you still can contact him, it takes you one more day to forget him. So, it's kinda redundant to me la!!! Hope you get what I mean. AND YOU BETTER STOP TAKING MEDICATION T O INDUCE THOSE SLEEPING SPELLS!
Second, was a death of a friend's brother. It was pretty shocking to hear the news. The first thing that came into my mind was whether that friend of mine is coping well. That's because, thinking through those times we spent smoking outside school for 2 hours with 11 sticks of cigarettes, sharing about troubles, pouring it all out to each other were definitely great. Though I know that we all meet different people, we all have different cliques now, I just want to let you know that my presence outside the library that day still shows that I care for you and I pray for you that you will cope well in handling this. And at any point of time, you wanna jio me out to hisap rokok, I am there okie?! Just call me or IM me! ((:
What memory lane? Well, the service learning trip did help me pretty much in being a better person. (though I can't and I think I will never shoo off the bitchiness and assertiveness in me.) And due to hectic schedules and stuff etc. we all forgot about it. Yes, I admit I forgot Boon Song, Mi-Mi-Lek, Mi-Mi-Ya, Da-tuk, etc. But they just flood back bringing me smiles and made me stop, take a step back and appreciate those littlest things in life. Just like how he treats me this evening, he knows that I was sick, when I slept on his shoulder, the sun rays was so glazing that it pierced into my eyes. He simply sweetly covered those rays so that I can sleep. He screams at me for not going to bed early and he screams at me for sleeping early when I am not well.
Baby, I know I am very very whiny and I get pissed off at the littlest things. Thank you for giving me your outmost patience. As much as I promised you, I will love, remember and be with you forever, I promise. ((: Happy 4th month my dearest baby! (:
4 comments:
I wish there is a manual in handling these stuffs. One that tells you a step-by-step guide in fixing the problem and makes everything better/gone in the end. Or worst if cant be fix, send it to the experts.. But there is no such a thing rite?..
A close friend once said, "dwelling on the matter is not helpful but cherishing the memories we once had, is".. So that's what I will be doing - cherishing; instead of creating new ones as that equates to another hurt/pain in the making..
But above all, I will be okay.. Slowly but surely.. I think this is what Life is all about isnt it?
Thank you for the reflections.
Thank you for all the words.
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!
Well, no worries babe! ((: I just hope that you'll be fine!
eheh i heard u put a ice cube into ur cheebai before? LOL head u say it felt SHIOK. LOL S-L-U-T
To Anoymous: You do not need to insult her in such a way. Though I haven't talk to her in years, you can't discriminate her. I believe that she has not change. She does not deserve her such comments from you. Please do widen your choice of vocabulary instead of using those crude words. It shows and reflects you as a person. As her team leader once, I telling you now that she doesn't need you coming around here and bringing her down because it would be a total waste of time.
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