Close To My Heart

Well, before I blog about something that is closed to my heart, Let me make this announcement! My lover boy scored the 4th goal in the 31st minute against San Marino. Absolutely awesome! But can't be compared to Ashlee's lover boy who scored 5 goals!

WAN-SUI!!!

And of course, not forgetting the biggest victory margin in the history of European Championship qualifiers.

AND... AGAIN! NOT FORGETTING!!! Another victory in which my lover boy captained Germany to a 1-0 win over Republic of Ireland in Stuttgart.

whoooooooo!!!!!!!! WAN SUI ar! (: happy happy happy.

As I said, I'm too busy attending meetings and loads more stuff la. But I still got a little time to squeeze in a movie on the 2nd of September! I know, How busy can I get? hahas. VERY BUSY! I'm stress to that level till I can't even sleep okays. And I had to feed on pills that make me drowsy so that I can sleep! How weird is that? I bet... What I am going through is DEFINITELY worse that the O levels. [ Because I didn't study during O levels mah! =X]

The Devil Wears Prada is an awesome movie man! One movie that I can relate to!

Best! Rated 4 out of 5 by Claralicious.

*Thumbs up*

Alright, The Storyline is about Miranda Priestly who is the head of Runway magazine, who has sporting silvery hair, a vast collection of fur coats, an encyclopedic knowledge of all things fashionable, and a killer smile. Miranda is full of wicked charm, with her mature beauty and commanding presence, Miranda is as fascinating to watch as she is intimidating to the constant rotation of assistants thrown her way. And when Northwestern graduate Andy Sachs interviews to become Miranda’s newest lackey, Miranda hires her not for her lackluster wardrobe but for her intellect. Inside the pristine Runway offices, Andy suffers through a never-ending list of impossible tasks, and is the subject of constant harassment by Miranda’s jealous first assistant, Emily Blunt. But to the dismay of Andy's boyfriend, Adrian Grenier and close friends, Andy slowly finds herself seduced by the glamorous world of fashion, and by Miranda herself. While Andy’s transformation comes largely in the form of new designer clothing, the makeover is mental as well.

That is a rough conclusion of the show by Golden Village[ i did some edits here and there la. Well, Basically, this girl, Andy, she is an intellectual girl. She didn't know anything about FASHION! Ohh man! She is practically those girls who know nuts about fashion. Oops.. Did I just repeat that? okays... And she was employed because Marinda decided to take a risk because she is intellectual. There was something in Andy that attracted Marinda. Marinda then gave Andy loads of impossible stuff to do. For example, getting an unreleased book of the latest Harry Potter Book for her twins. And damn, Marinda always says that she is such a disappointing assistant. However, in some way or so, Andy eventually outran Marinda's first assistant, Emily. Andy then got a chance to go to Paris with Marinda. And during this process, Andy actually neglected her boyfriend, Adrian. And not forgetting Marinda who also neglected her family as well.
Everyone around Andy just drifted away from her. Just because they feel that she had change. A person who does not like fashion, to a person who carries Chanel, Gucci, Christian Dior, Guess, Prada etc. Not forgetting a person who loves her boyfriend so much and to a person who values her work more than anyone else. And she had a fling when she broke up with her boyfriend.

What it is gotta do with me? How? You guys wonder. No one knows about this. But only those who have been through this route with me. Baby Dickson and Ms Siti. Those are the only two I can only think of. I remembered at that time, Ms Siti wasn't really close with me la. But my Baby knew about it because he was in this with me.

I know... I gonna bore you guys with this... but if you guess feel like closing this window, you guys can go ahead! (:

I clearly remember that it was this month last year... eh... nono! okays. this is getting weird and scary! The day that started everything was this very day, last year!

*points middle finger*

Ohh man.. I think no one understands. okays. My baby had a major fight this day, last year. We had a cold war. And I clearly rememebered that today is the day when all my bitches and friends celebrated my bdae with me at White Sands' Mac[2nd level]. And my baby walked past with his friends. He saw me and he did not say hi. At that moment, I almost broke down. We had a total cold war. We didn't contact one another till the 22nd of September. Can't help it la. We got our egos la. Not forgetting, he was also with one of my best friends who i knew for 5 years. (In a relationship) I clearly remember that I was hoping for a bdae wish from him. And I told myself that, that wish determines whether this relationship would end or continue. Well, readers, you guys think that he did wish me right? That is because we are together right?

However, UNFORTUNATELY, HE DIDN'T.

How did we end up being together again?

This is where the movie, The Devil Wears Prada comes in, in relation to my life.
From the 15th of September 2005 to 22nd September 2005. I pulled through strongly. I knew I will stay strong. Telling myself that I'll definitely find a better guy. During that period, I prepared the separation gift.- A box filled with 163 straw hearts (the number of days we were together), the first picture we took at Tampines' S11, a letter, and a CD (a complilation that I did for the songs that we both... err.. sing together and etc.)

I was soooo determined that I want a break up and I have set mind mind into it. We met up together with the old group. We TRIED to sort things out. But we didn't eventually. Why? Just one reason: MAN'S EGO! We broke up. And out of rage, I threw the whole damn bloody box away, into a bin in front of him. My bitches were shocked. And I remembered one of them said that it was all hard work. And I had to threw it away. I was crying all the way home. I think the taxi driver think I siao. hahas. Then Ms Siti... aiya, that's another story la. =X

I pulled through misery till the 15th October. The other side of me came alive.
What is the other side? I became like Wandi. hahas. GOTHIC. SADISTIC. I then met my primary school friend. Nicholas Grabriel Chan Hai Long, at that point of time, I went into that relationship right after my baby broke up with my best friend. Just a split second! Really, JUST A SPLIT SECOND. Dickson called me, "I broke up with Flavia already. "

hahas. And course, I didn't patch back with him. I was so called in love with that primary school friend. I wasn't sure whether it was love. Maybe it was just companionship la. After O levels, I started to find jobs. I went for a job interview at IL FIORE RESTAURANT AND BAR. My big boss, Angie was exactly like Marinda. She is an independent woman, demanding, yet kind. She didn't have a good marriage either. She is a single parent. As her waitress, I was pushed over to the limits. She expects tip top service etc. I saw life in a wider scope. I saw the reality of life there. I learnt a lot. And I knew that I became stronger as a person. Through all these, I dare say that I was more mature compared to how I was. And because of this, I believe I do not need anyone. And I withdraw away from my social circle. The only friends I had were my fellow waitress, chefs and Angie. That is when everyone said that I changed as a person. A person who eats, sleeps and work. I was too engrossed with my work. People didn't like me. That is because I started smoking for the 3rd time. I drank till I was drunk at the work place. I totally became a slut. That is where the devil arose. But deep inside, I know that I was NOT A BAD PERSON. And to me, if people can't accept my change, fuck it. People say that I AM A SLUT. FUCK IT. So what if my sense of dressing changes? At least I know that I survived under my own rice bowl. I may get drunk after drinking half litre of vodlka absolute (neat) with my friend. But who cares? As long as I know that I don't sleep with other man. At least I know I still stick by my own principles. WHO CARES?

Till today, that me still exist. I used to be that girl who can't do without a man, without friends. But now, I can do without a man, without THAT LARGE circle of friends I used to have. My baby USED TO believe that I need to be tame and he always say that it seems that I can do without him. But I'm glad that he have learn to accept this new me.
Bottomline, If people can't accept your change, FUCK IT. At this stage, people grow. There isn't such thing as you fall because you are weak. THE FACT IS: The moment you pick yourself up from that fall, you learn a lesson either on the surface or behind the curtains, and when you learn that lesson, you grow to become a stronger person. Behind every change, there is a reason to it. (:

I'm sastified with today's entry. Though a little bit lengthy, but I'm glad that I'm able to share this here.
And with this, I shall make this promise here, with all my readers as my witness,

I, Clara Liew Yan Jin hereby promise Dickson Liaw Da Soon, that I will put that specific bad memory behind. Though it has been a year, and the past still haunts we both. We will definitely look forward to what we have. Just like friendship, I promised that I won't be there FOREVER, but I promised that I will be there whenever and wherever I can.

Why that phrase?
Just like friendship, I promised that I won't be there FOREVER, but I promised that I will be there whenever and wherever I can.

That is because, I NEVER believe that things last forever. If you made that promise.. FOREVER, and if the person needs you there, and you have to attend to unforeseen circumstances, and you can't be there for that person, isn't that breaking your promise? Because you gave your word, FOREVER.

Good topic to debate about. But what matters now is my poly forum performance at Bishan later. (:

P.S: 7 more days to my big day! (:

scratched @ 1.30am