Clara is lazy

It's like 11.22PM now. I am so bored, PISSED, AND MORE PISSY!

I was looking through so many blogs and kinda feel that my blog needs a revamp! I am sick of the black background. I want a white for a change with my favourite shades. ARGHS! And can you believe it?! I am looking at some tutorials to help me up. PLUS I am feeling so lazy la. PLUS my PP assessment date is out! I have like 3 weeks to complete the damn poster (You can't blame me for being so lucky!) whereas Terence's assessment date is like in 5 DAYS TIME!

Well, for the past week, it seems like there's a huge volcano eruption taking place at home. I just don't like it. It's happening to the end that I do not wish to do anything at all. It's getting all sickening with the same old problem.

Completeness

When RED turns BLUE.

With all that's happening, it is already blue. I do not fear anymore.

With all that's happening around me, I just feel that I am starting to hate my life even more. I will learn how to zip my mouth up. Cos' I am not surprise about things that's gonna happen or had already happen. I do not need someone to preach me about what I did. Don't you realise that what I did is mainly because of you? I need someone who can support me, someone who will be there without being asked to. I am already numb. I am in not in a good shape.
If only I didn't see what I didn't want to see. If only I didn't experience what I didn't want to experience. If only I had do things the right way right from the start. I suddenly feel that the things she said was right. And the words, phrases, sentences she said are still hurting so badly.

-My wish will not come true right from the start of my first breathe of this world cos' it's just fate.

The girl that never fails to amaze me

I just do not know why! But the Stella bug is eating into me! I can't stop blogging about her la! She is just one girl that never fails to amaze me. I checked out her blog for some reason. Not a reason actually, but just a tingling feeling to check it out.

PLEASE NOMINATE HER AS MS SAS! BEAUTIFUL SWAN WHAT!

STELLA LOOK ALIKES

I have always been wanting to blog about this entry la. But then I can't seem to find the inspiration. But I just wanna get this blog entry over and done with. Well, remember the craze that everyone have with matching your picture and the celebrities you look a-like with. I guess it depends what picture you place in.


This is like my celebrity look-alikes la! Which I DO NOT DARE TO PROCLAIM I LOOK LIKE THEM. Cos' I feel that it is like SUPER FAR OFF CAN! That is HORRIBLE considering that I am using my ugliest photo from my photoshoot.... BUT, the point is not about me. I am posting this for the benefit of people who cannot view stella's friendster profile. So, let's look at Stella's look-alikes?!

READY?!

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HERE WE GO!!!
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TA DAH!

Wah lau! All her celebrities look-alike are all more famous than my celebrities look-alike. Somemore prettier leh! DIE LIAO LA! THAT MEANS STELLA IS PRETTIER THAN ME! SO... DOES THAT MEAN TERENCE WILL FALL FOR STELLA?!
Boyfriend, please do not fall for her, I promise to be as pretty as I can! ( It's a joke la! My Baby Boy isn't that superficial)

Can you imagine Stella having 80% resemblance of Claire Danes(who is a Golden Globe Award-winning and Emmy Award-nominated American film, television, and theater actress)?! I HOPE CLAIRE DANES SEE THIS POST and she will go like, "eeeeekkk... who the fuck is that?!" who knows, she will rather kill herself! And I only hold 86% resemblance to Joey Yung a popular singer and actress from Hong Kong, who I think if I go to US and ask around about Joey Yung, people will go like, "who the fuck is that?!" But Claire Danes?! Most people know her can?! Not only Claire Danes la! DREW BERRYMORE LOOK LIKE STELLA LEH! OMG?!?! WHAT HAVE THE WORLD BECOME?!?! WHY DO THE UGLY DESERVE NICER CELEBRITIES LOOK-ALIKE?!

Nevermind, I guess this online thingy is a huge comfort or rather MORALE BOOSTER for Stella who breaks more than a dozen of mirrors since she was born. hmmm...

On a side note, I never thought that I would have such talent to help BABY Terence out with his blog template! First Time la! But it was a piece of cake! (No brushes of course! I not that expert leh!) :)) A piece of my artwork, CLICK HERE. (Though he haven't done his own adjustments!)

Apologize

I can't explain anything more, but this is it:

I'm holding on your rope
Got me ten feet off the ground
And I'm hearing what you say
But I just can't make a sound

You tell me that you need me
Then you go and cut me down
But wait...
You tell me that you're sorry
Didn't think I'd turn around and say..

That it's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

I'd take another chance, take a fall, take a shot for you
And I need you like a heart needs a beat (But that's nothing new)
Yeah yeah I loved you with a fire red, now it's turning blue
And you say
Sorry like the angel heaven let me think was you

But I'm afraid It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
Woahooo woah

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

I said it's too late to apologize, yeah yeah
I said it's too late to apologize, a yeah

I'm holding on your rope
Got me ten feet off the ground

Apologize by Timbaland feat. One republic

KONG SONG LIN PART 2

Somehow, I am such a great surfer that I happen to bump into Kong Songlin's blog. It was a piece of cake for me to pounce upon his blog compared to finding Terence's Meteorology Mock Exam Papers. I said that he was gay right?! VOILA! I GOT PROVE FROM THE MAN HIMSELF. Click Here. P.S: I do not have an issue with homosexuals but I have a problem with him now. Well, I have an issue with him saying that mental illness is going crazy or something but I will leave this for another post ya!

Well, in his latest post, he actually blog about (according to him) A FUCKING BITCH who made a fuss over chocolate cake thrown onto her. Post is HERE. (You can check out his GAY blog as well)

Well, first of all, I could not understand half of his post. That's because his ENGLAND IS TOO POWDERFUL. He does not need to have PERFECT WRITTEN ENGLISH but at least READABLE la! Well, I will be a FUCKING BITCH now and comment on every single thing he blog about.

• On the way we chat a lot, lucky i came with him if not i think i will go crazy man walking alone…. then he told me he had an extra Absolute Vodka Blackcurrent drink at home !!! I was like “WTH!!!!” why nv say!!! its okie lah cuz i nv told him i bring alcohol mah =) so he also dunnoe …. next time got outing i’ll get him to bring his version along =) hahahhaa.

Well, this guy is so pathetic la! I am like WTH now la. Songlin so sua ku, never drink alcohol before! Wah, they got A LOT OF VERSIONS LA! I didn't know that Absolut Kurant is called Absolute Vodka Blackcurrent drink!(P.S: He can't even spell blackcurrant!) HAHA. And I didn't know that Absolut Kurant is a DRINK not a Spirit!!!

• Shannon, godwin and someone came along…. we were like “erm …. Why shannon and Godwin nv tell us they are coming …” But then we not so bad and shoo them away lah we just let them be...

Of course la! Mr Songlin is always so gay (happy)! Where got so bad one leh?! Of course you never shoo us away la! WHAT RIGHT HAVE YOU GOT TO SHOO US AWAY?! On WHAT BASIS?! On the basis that we came down NEAR your BBQ pit and SAT NEAR THE BBQ PIT?! Note: NEAR LEH. Of course you HAVE TO LET US BE. Or rather, IT'S A MUST TO LET US BE. You didn't book the bench NEAR the BBQ pit also leh! We never disturb you leh unless some idiotic people step on my tail la!

• Highlights coming!!!! SJ smash Huici with her cake(the cake cost $60++ like WTF why get such a F***ing EX CAKE?!?!?!?!) and SJ start to make huici mad and huici start to get everyone who are there dirty of cuz not someone lah …. =) then we were playing and enjoying ourselve…. THEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! some women sound was being heard …” I’m So Pissed!!!! Cakes are meant to eat and not to be thrown!!!! I’m so getting out of there!!!” she start screaming and making a fuss of out it but then thing is we did not even care about her =). To us she is just some F***ing B**** make noise out of it(hello and excuse me, if you know we are going to throw the cakes, you can jolly well WALK away and not seating there like a stone and when things happened you start making a fuss out of it and by the way, it is OUR friend’s birthday party and not yours and YOU are not even INVITED!!! so SCRAM !!!!).

Wah... I didn't know that the bimbotic scream I let out was one of the highlights! I didn't know that he saw my twin sister! (Note: He used WOMEN.) I think it was the vodka that made him drunk till he saw another me. Wah.... I feel damn god honored that I am one of the highlights! :)though you said "we did not even care about her =)." I suggest you should be changing it to, "my friends did not even care about her, but I did! Cos' I said "go home la! no one ask u to come here." I'm sorry that I didn't make it known because I am hum ji!" Well, on top of that, he said that I should walk away and not SEAT there like a stone and screamed when things happen. Well, I told Terence (before the cake landed on me) that I trust that they should know their limits. I do not care if they throw the cake, as long as they know that there are people SEATING on the bench, and they should have common sense not to throw the cake where someone is SEATING there. But apparently, that's not the case, they behave as though as they RENTED THE ENTIRE PLACE. I pity the poor bangalahs or rather the old man or woman who will have to sweep the cake off. tsk tsk tsk. Take it for example, if Mr Lee Hsien Loong was SEATING there, after taking a casual walk down the beach, will they apologised if they smash cake onto his back? Of course they will la. Why is it so unfair? Though Mr Lee is the Prime Minister, he is also a human, just like me. Why do I don't deserve an apology? It's unfair isn't it? Not only the Prime Minister, but just a stranger who is SEATED there and got cake thrown onto his or her back will receive an apology from them. I wasn't bitchy towards them what! So what if I am Shannon's and Godwin's friend? Does the title of being their friend unable me to deserve an apology just because of their "highness" or is it because they do not have basic courtesy?! To add on, I am not a stone! If I am a stone, that makes him a GAY STONE. Besides, if he was using stone as an adjective to describe me, I was moving la. I was not stoning, in fact, I was talking to Terence and Godwin. I can't imagine me SEATING THERE LIKE A STONE and get my entire body numb. My nerve system is not spoilt mind you. Furthermore, I did not say I was invited what! I am not that thick- skinned. That GAY BOY only have the right to question my presence if I ate food that I did not pay for, drank your ABSOLUTE VOKDA BLACKCURRENT DRINK or some soft drinks without paying MY SHARE when I AM NOT INVITED. I didn't eat or drink anything because I clearly know that I AM NOT INVITED. I DID NOT DO ANYTHING TO OFFEND YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE AND I SAT FAR AWAY FROM YOU. I can just be a passerby what! So, my presence should not be a problem to you.

Note: He does not even know his basic command of the English Language: Punctuation

” I’m So Pissed!!!! Cakes are meant to eat and not to be thrown!!!! I’m so getting out of there!!!”

Notice his Open inverted commas are also Close inverted commas? HAHA. PATHETIC! And according to what he typed, I do not believe that I have such a bad command in the English Language, in my own defense, I said, " I’m so pissed! Cakes are meant to BE EATEN and not thrown! I’m GETTING OUT OF THIS FUCKING PLACE!" I guess my bitches seen me through my bitch moments. The word fucking is just used as an adjective to describe how pissed I am. I suggest he do some soul-searching before commenting on a FUCKING BITCH like me. Period.

If only I could turn back time... -UPDATED

I was supposed to finish this post yesterday. But I was too mad to continue (due to a reason which I am going to blog about) plus I had Chelsea players running on the field IN the TV against Wigan and I was too emo to blog this morning and afternoon. So, I shall continue right now. Before ranting about what pissed me off, let me introduce to you a replica of me in E44D.(With reference to the picture above) The girl beside me is Vivian. When I first entered this class, Ter saw her and said, "That Vivian, is like you. Both of you have the same pattern one!"

I do not believe, but both of us carried on doing and talking random stuff especially when we are in the same team for the day. We will talk about stuff and the entire class will go on laughing and/ or the class will be all grossed out. It's as if we are the muscle relaxants of the class. 2 days ago, Vincent was caught in between both of us. We were exchanging some words and guess what he said, "I cannot tolerate both of you, both of you same pattern one!" OMG! Another person who said that! NVM. Some evidences of how Vivian can be SO RANDOM.SHE TRIED TAKING A PICTURE OF CHERIE BERRIE'S EXPOSED BOXERS! And she failed and she decided to take it again! :))
She can just go snap snap and u didn't know that she took a picture of you. I tried snapping her cleavage but failed badly. P.S: She was wearing a red bra that day!My holidays started off very roughly! Godwin, Ter and I went to Plaza Singapura's Spotlight and we did some random stuff!


OKIE! HERE COMES THE PART THAT TOTALLY SPOILT MY NIGHT AND GAVE ME A WRONG START TO THE HOLIDAYS!
(I understand that this blog is QUIET widely spread among Republicians because of the STELLA SAGA. But if any band members who attended Hui Ci's Birthday BBQ is reading this, please do not continue reading this if you do not want to. )

After Godwin purchased his stuff, we met Shannon. We then went to Secret Recipe to buy a birthday cake for this girl name Hui Ci. WE finally settled for a moist chocolate cake. (Note: WE)We then took a bus to Katong and cab down to East Coast park. WE took turns to carry the cake! (Note: WE) When we were in the cab, someone called Shannon or Godwin to buy ICE! (I swear none of us were having a bad day) First thing that came to our mind: Aren't the first few people who reache first HELP OUT in getting everything organised?! And it was not along our way to get ice. We were in the cab and we were stuck in a freaking slow traffic! Furthermore, there were people already at the BBQ pit = got manpower. Why cannot go and buy yourself?! After that, we were cool, and we forgot about the matter.

When we reached there, there was some strange glances at me and Ter! Ter decided to forget it and take it that the pit was filled with ungrateful brats. So, we went to slack at a nearby bench with the accompany of some music from the mini-mart and the bicycle station in front of us. Ter went back to the BBQ pit to take something and realised that his TUMI bag was on the floor. Alright, for this, we shall not accused anyone of THROWING the bag on the floor, we'll just use RE-POSITION. Initially, Ter's bag was on the wooden stool, and when he got back, he saw his bag on the dirty ground. Bloody Hell! That bag is $450 BEFORE DISCOUNT OKIE! Why that someone cannot place his or her bag on top of Ter's bag?! So, let's just forget it. 15 mins later, Shannon went back to check on something and realised all the bags were RE-POSITION AGAIN. (That's okie!)

BUT WORSE OF ALL, someone asked Shannon, "Why you never tell that Ter and his gf coming?" and Shannon said, "Why?! They not eating what. " And that person replied, "at least must tell what!"

Eh, excuse me, YOU IS BIG FUCK IS IT?! I MUST TELL U I COMING HUH?!

CLARA LIEW YAN JIN'S PRINCIPLE IS THAT: I NEVER PAY FOR THE BBQ, I DON'T EAT. NOT EVEN DRINK A SINGLE DROP OF WATER FROM YOU.

Can't you take it that Ter and me was just having some romantic walk down East Coast Beach (though it won't be an ideal place for me) and just bump into Godwin and Shannon? And just hang out with them?!

You buy the WHOLE EAST COAST PARK HUH?! YOUR GRANDFATHER IS LEE KUAN YEW IS IT?! Ter and I also NEVER TAKE A SINGLE DROP OF WATER FROM YOU, LET ALONE A PIECE OF MICROSPORIC CHICKEN! So, what is your problem?!

Poor Shannon was being make use of. He was there BBQ-ing non-stop just like a Sai-Kang Warrior. Some people still complain that the chicken wings were a bit blackish! Please la! You guys so smart, go and BBQ yourself la! Complain and complain!

I see liao also BUAY SONG! But there's nothing I can do. It's not my party anyway, and the way they treat the moist chocolate cake was HORRIBLE. If they wanna sabo the birthday girl, cut a piece of the cake and sabo la! Just literally slam her face onto the cake. Who is going to eat?! AMIDST OF ALL THESE, EVERYONE JUST LEFT SHANNON OUT! Please la! Damn horrible. Furthermore, they started throwing the chocolate cake at one another. As I say, it doesn't concern me unless they cross their borders. AND THEY REALLY DID!

I WAS TALKING TO GODWIN AND TER WHEN SOME CAKE LANDED ON THE BACK OF MY ZARA TOP MY MUM'S ZARA TOP!

FUCKING HELL! I IMMEDIATELY STAND UP AND LET OUT A FREAKING BIMBOTIC SCREAM. Godwin was so funny and he told me to cool down and Ter immediately took out tissue papers and wipe the chocolate off my back. This time they really crossed the border, MY TERRORITY WHICH IS MY SHIRT! At that moment I really wanted to slam the girls against a tree nearby me.

THIS IS THE WORST BBQ I EVER ATTENDED.

Updated:

Anyhow, I will be releasing a new SEG saga soon. Ms SAS(Stella) is not over yet. I just found out something. I will blog about it soon enough. In the meantime, guess who is Ms SEG! *evil laughters* LOL! Before I actually released Ms SEG, Mr SAS, MR KONG SONG LIN, actually volunteered himself to be up here to partner with Ms Stella.

Well, if he didn't offend me in any way, I can't even be bothered to look at his face. (Cos' he looks like a cartoon character.- I'm already very kind not to use SHITFACE ) However, he offended me in some god- knows- what way. First of all, I am pretty scared la. I am actually thinking whether I should continue with this updated post because I think he might murder me if he sees this post cos' a pretty girl like Miss Universe 2007: would not be able to seduce him. HE IS GAY! And he would not be a gentleman to let me off. *trembles feet* But hack! I already started the ball rolling, so why not go on?! Can you imagine IF he ask a guy, " I wanna get fucked by you. Will you?! " And forget about imagining his face when he is having orgasms. His partner probably have to cover his face with a plastic bag. Eeeeewwww.... Please, I got nothing against homosexuals. But I got something against Kong Song Lin. Well, this is because, when I screamed that I wanna go home (during the BBQ.) He said, "Go la! No one ask you to come here!" I didn't hear it of course, so now, you guys can say that I am barbaric, I do not care whether I am accusing him of something that I did not hear with my own ears. I can get a witness who heard that to testify. I do not give a damn whether he is a damn Concert Master or A GAY. He offend me means offend me! In my OWN PERCEPTION, guys who play the saxophone should be one hot guy with abs and not one with a DAMN JIAO BIN (like Song Lin). He stepped on the wrong tail. And I also heard that his ex-classmates DO NOT like him at all. Maybe he has some attitude problem just like Stella. (No wonder they are made for each other- I forgot, he does not fancy girls) What is his problem?! Well, I do not understand, he just paid his own pathetic share of $10 for the reservation of the BBQ pit, some food, etc. for the party and he got the cheek to make that comment. I guess he got NO BALLS. (Aiya, what's with me, HE IS GAY!) Pardon me readers, I keep forgetting that he is GAY. If he is not gay, probably, he got the balls to shout that comment right at my face. WHY?! If he is pissed that I screamed, then doesn't he just shout it out loud just like me? Maybe he just wanna RESPECT his seniors because afterall, I am his seniors' friend. But then again, if he or everyone there respects their seniors, SHIT WOULD NOT HAVE HAPPEN. He only paid $10 leh! He got pay to rent the entire place a not?! Lee Kuan Yew is his best friend is it?! If he thinks he is a BIG FUCK, then tell it to me right at my face la! CONCERT MASTER WHAT! BIG ENOUGH FUCK! I sat at least a few metres away from the BBQ pit okie! And I was sitting on the bench that the public is allow to sit even if you book the BBQ pit near that bench. SO?! I didn't get a pinch of your food, a drop of your water. I only place my bag at the table which is QUIET NEAR (at least a metre) to your BBQ pit. (which I am not sure whether that table comes with the reservation!) If it does and if you wanna be calculative, I give u $10 for placing my bag on the damn table la! COME TO E44D before this entire semester ends. I PAY U LA! FUCKING GAY!

P.S: I cannot confirm that he is gay. But a friend told me that he is. So, I am writing this based on a friend's testimony. Reliable a not, Up to you to believe.

Within Myself

From all those fightings, I came into realisation that it's doom. I must learn how to control my own emotions. Prevention is still better than cure. It's takes time to heal heartbreaks, heartbreaker. We hurt each other with the things we wanted to say.


At the end of this journey, I hope to learn something. And that's to hide. History is gonna repeat and this time I really hope it succeeds cos' I badly want it to. I would not expect to be noticed. I would not expect to be treated differently. I will make with what I have. In no time, those words won't touch me. I will stay strong cos' I WANT TO. Everything seems like a ROUTINE now. Nothing else is special. Friends, stop calling, I won't entertain unless you are one of those closer ones who have been there for me sincerely. I will quit for some time. MAYBE.


-The other side is still empty, and I think it will never be taken. Those were the nights alone.

detests

I hate it.

I hate it when I am okie. Really fine.

And something that reminds me of you comes up, and I go crashing down again.

Self-Praise

It's good.

I'm hiding them well. I'm coping well.

You made me this way. I'm sorry.

I wonder if you noticed.

Ad: Storage Solutions!

I was browsing through this webbie when I came across this Diamond Plate Garbage Can! It's so cute! It looks so pretty and shiny too! But, The price is WOW! I do not think I can afford it. Nevertheless, they have the Neon Clocks which is kinda cool. Especially this one. If they have the one with an aircraft, I will DEFINITELY get it for Ter. Well, whatever it is, they have a wide range from Diamond Plate Garage Cabinets to Car Decors. Well, you can actually find large storage bins where you can place your stuff like your gardening stuff, even big or small toys. Visit HERE to know more! ((:

This explains it all...

You Are 93% Bitchy

Ouch, you've got a heart of steel, and you don't mind throwing out cutting insults to whomever you hate. Those who know you well know not to mess with you. And those who don't know you well are plain scared of you!

How Bitchy Are You?

Online Shopping Sprees

I thought my blogging bug flew away. But I can't resist ranting! I was introduced to online shopping few years back. For the past few years, I have been just looking and browsing around. Pages to pages, sites to sites. Being a perfectionist, I never trust buying stuff online even if they look so pretty. Even when I went over to Terence's place, his mum just showed me some pages and stuff. I wasn't that keen because I DO NOT TRUST online shopping. Because my shopping principles:

1. Must look at the actual item. (See whether REALLY nice a not)
2. Must try on myself. ( See whether it fits me or it suits me. Because some stuff might not suit me though I like it. Do not ever buy something you like but doesn't suit you! )
3. Must check for defects.

OH MY GOD! Life is so unfair! Why must the shooping bug eats into me when I am finanically unstable?! And when I am finanically stable, I feel that I do not need anything at all! For some reason, IT'S SO UNFAIR! I WANNA BE RICH!!! I WANNA BE RICH!!! Why does Paris Hilton get everything she wants and not be a good girl?! Make me rich and I promise I will still be good.

Well, some people might comment that I am pathetic because I am finanically unstable. But please, AT LEAST I ADMIT I AM. I know my limits in spending. Not like some people who put up a brave front (and brag) that they are finanically stable when they are not. Those are the real pathetic ones! ((: Okie, Big Digression here.
Back to those irritating blogs with nice dresses and necklaces. Click here for the top 100 sites. My favourite is still this. Cos' the accessories are MY TASTE. So Vintage, a little dash of bling blings and most importantly, they are unique! Not many people are wearing it. Imagine walking down the streets and see people wearing the same thing as u. LIKE UNIFORM LA!

Okie, Whatever, before I start buying them using my paypal, I will ask for my gay partner's opinion. He knows my taste in accessories! ((:

P.S: Blogging bug, Please come back to me so that I can blog more and get more money in my paypal!!! I wanna go to Olympics 2008 to watch Fencing Matches. Sponsors anyone?!

the test.

Well, there will be a lack of posts. Whatever it is, I hope you try this: CLICK HERE

It's a Colour Vision Deficiency Test. A friend just send me this link. Have fun! ((:

Sweet Surrender.

I am done. Epithelial tissues, Connective tissues, Muscle tissues can't seem to be absorbed. For an alternative, I decided to continue doing things I always enjoy doing late at this hour, however, I still can't get myself to do it after the overwhelming feelings of betrayal.

Since young, my feelings NEVER prove me wrong.

My head is still spinning, it's been a week and the hurt still remain- I am still unwell.
For now, I rather stay in and never be discharged.
Now, I wish I didn't want to study for my test.
I wish I didn't see things that I didn't want to see.
Sometimes I wonder whether I am doing too much. Am I?
Am I giving too much?! Am I?
Though humans fault.
What is forgiving without forgetting? It works in a pair.

P.S: For all that are close to me, If I ever fault, Do not forgive me if you can't forget. I rather not be forgiven.

Something to remember

I was caught up in a dilemma whether to earn some peanuts by blogging or to look through some stuff online. Looks like I have already made my choice from the title of this post.

I was looking through some emails from my RP email. What emails you wonder?! Well, emails that reminded me of how stressed, busy I was during this period last year. Handling the HPB project after Poly Forum, and the Thailand trip. They all seem so yesterday.

I just realised I have these photos:

Sorry honey that I post this up. I know it's your hair, they gone wild. It's payback for playing ping pong without me :)

The 2 humans circled in yellow are Ridwan and Ina. I wonder who is the long hair guy I spotted with 2 girls in the orange circle. Might be Ashley, or Terence.

I will never forget the little girl (beside me) coming up to me, telling me this in a small squeaky voice, "Jie Jie, My mummy haven't come yet." HAHAS. DAMN CUTE LA! I accompanied her all the way till her mum came. I thought her how to be a cam whore. :D

28/09/2006 was the 4th Service Learning Trip meeting conducted by Ridwan which is also to welcome 3 NEW MEMBERS INTO THE TEAM: MIKE, TERENCE AND EDWIN. I remember clearly that they were supposed to do a short introduction of themselves and Terence was super noisy and he gave me quite a bad impression. :D And he said that he was from Biomedical Electronics and I told Wee Boon, "eh.. same course as me..." And Terence was happy because he thought he had a senior already la! Can teach him stuff that he do not know. ASS! Terence and Mike were then posted into my team and I was thinking, "ya what! new members, new people that I do not like. Ridwan's Poly Forum team, BIG FUCK HUH?!" But, I just bit my lips and went on, Mike and Terence made things more difficult for me by not attending meetings and I was so fed up till I gave up.

17/11/2006 was the movie marathon. We all spend one night in school. Hmm... before we left, we all took a group photo. And we sang a birthday song for Wee Boon, and after that, we sang a birthday song for Terence when he was in the toilet. IT WAS THAT LOUD! And I gave the birthday boys a hug each.

And just a blink of an eye, it's 2007, next? 2008?! I have no idea why I am feeling so nostalgic. I am back with pictures now.

For some reason, I miss my black hair.

The aftermath.

My neck hurts, my head feels like I had a horrible hangover. My nose bridge is damn pain cos' I hit the floor face flat.

The last thing I remember was that I was in the observation room. For the past 2 days, I have no idea what happened. All I remember was the flashing lights of street lamps, traffic lights, some muffled voices, for I know I wasn't conscious.

People told me that I asked questions repeatedly (which I think I didn't!), like I asked the same question every 20 seconds. The only thing I know is that I was sober when I was in the observation room at 12am.

There was a damn stupid straw that was inserted into my skin which hurts big time. Till now, I do not think I remember anything. I am just blur right now. I was told that I was sent to Mount Alvernia Hospital and then to Singapore General Hospital. hmm...

Thanks Siti and Kim for the cake:

I really appreciate it. Not forgetting all the others' well wishes too.

If anyone wonder what happen, the doctor's primary diagnosis was head injury with amnesia. That explains it all. What cause it? Low blood pressure.

As always, I will say something abnormal. I enjoy seeing boys cry. I enjoy it when Terence cry. HAHAS. But I missed the show. I was unconscious la! WASTED.
Whatever it is, Precious, Thanks for tolerating my questions that I asked repeatedly. Thanks for staying up till the wee hours. Thanks for everything. There's nothing more I can ask for. :)

Your Loss

It's a pity. It's a shame to see what you've loss in the past decades.
You lost a little best friend who you can speak to about soccer.
You lost a faithful lover.
You lost the respect that was given to you that once shone brightly.
You lost a best friend who can speak to you about anything.

You implement fear in everyone's eyes.
You turned love to hatred.

I'm sick, I'm tired. From me to you, let's all just drop it will we?! It's worthless. I do not look at you the same way anymore. Things change. Your words are shit. Your actions tells another story. Let's stop being fake around here, will you?

Isolation

Eversince the 1st incident in May 2005, I thought those who come and go in my life will be the ones that I trust the most. Just because, there's an extra element in them compared to my best friends. For now, I blame myself for having that mis-conception. Cos' no one prove this right. Time and time again, I get disappointed. I do not expect anyone to tell me what to do, all i want is someone to listen, and then talk to me. However, I made the wrong choice of reliance. It always seems that no one cares and I have to worry more when shit happens. ACTIONS SPEAKS LOUDER THAN WORDS.

Best friends, I am sorry. I hope it's not too late.

heat and fire.

It's human's nature. For every single soul on earth is different in their own way though most share certain characteristics. It's taxing, having to change a part of you that is your nature. But for some some reasons, humans work in the weirdest ways.

Sometimes, we do not work in acceptance, and just walk away.

Somehow, I feel that I am in some slow motion tunnel for the past few weeks, waiting for that day to come where I will be completely perfect. Not really actually, maybe, close to perfection. I do not run into the lion's mouth anymore. But, whenever it's time, I run towards the sea, and drown myself in my own. That's how I am coping. Ask me why?! Because I want a better feeling for myself. Not really actually, AGAIN. For someone else perhaps.

Somehow, I feel that I am living in deception. I had to find another way out for myself, another alternative. I had no choice. ( And when they say, life is full of choices, somehow, I feel that it's bullshit now. It's pretty subjective. )

At times, I ask myself whether it was a right decision. Ironically, I do not have an answer to my own question.

However, I bow down to those who have accepted me.